Tag Archive | Get inspired

How to rekindle the spark in your love-life.

Sometimes we lose the spark in our love lives, we ignore our mates and get carried away. Other times we just get too comfortable that the love life begins to wither. See what Psychologists have to say about that and how to rekindle that spark once more…

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Lady Unique Forum: Dating for 4years and I dont love him.

Good afternoon Ladies unique,
As you know this is a platform for ladies to share their opinions on a particular topic of concern.
Please do share your views you can choose to be Anonymous or include your name.
Your opinion(s) should be posted on the “comment area”

Here is the Topic of concern(TOC) of the day:
Hello ladies, I have been dating this guy for 4years but suddenly it feels strange to marry him. He just proposed and wants to marry me but I do not love him that much. How do I tell him how I feel without crushing his emotions?

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I stumbled upon this book sometimes in November last year. It is a book for women but men could learn from it as well to help the women around them.
It was written by Joyce Meyer, a best selling author in New York. It is a book that explains and defines what a confident woman should be. It explains the duties and highlights the responsibilities of a woman and a wife.
The book is called THE CONFIDENT WOMAN.
In it, Joyce Meyer shared a lot of useful tips by relating it biblically and realistically. She emphasized on FEAR and how it prevents women from doing what they are meant to do as well as living boldly and peacefully. She also talked about the “Proverbs 31 woman”.
Its a must add to the shelf. It is well packed.
From all that was written in the book, she shared seven secrets of confident women which I will be sharing with you.
Secret #1- A confident woman knows that she is loved. Love is the healing balm that the world needs, and God offers it freely and continuously.
It is not uncommon to see women who feel unloved. There are women who feel so bad about themselves that they get involved with men that will hurt them, because they believe that is all they deserve.
A confident woman however does not fear being unloved, because she knows first and foremost that God loves her unconditionally.
To be whole and complete, we need to know that we are loved.

Secret #2- A confident woman refuses to live in fear.
“I will not fear” is the only acceptable attitude we can have towards fear. That doesn’t mean that we will never feel fear, but it does mean that we will not allow it to rule our decisions and actions.
Unless we make a firm decision to “fear not”, we will never be free from the power of it. Fear seems to be epidemic in our society. Are you afraid of anything? Is it rejection, failure, the past, the future, loneliness, driving, aging, the dark, heights, life or death? The list of fears that people experience can be endless. However, one has to firmly make their mind up that they will not live in fear.
Fear prevents one from making progress. For instance, fear of people not opening the link to read this could have prevented me from posting this article, but confidence says try and the turn out could be overwhelming.

Secret #3- A confident woman is positive.
Confidence and negativity do not go together. They are like oil and water, they simply do not mix. Being positive or negative is a CHOICE- it is a way of thinking, speaking and acting. Either one comes from a habit that has been formed in our lives through repetitious behavior.
Thinking negatively makes you miserable. Why be miserable when you can be happy.

Secret #4- A confident woman recovers from set backs.
We don’t need to see setbacks as failure. A person is not a failure because she tried some things that did not work out. She fails only when she stops trying.
Don’t ever say “I just cannot go on”. Instead say, I can do whatever I need to do through christ who strengthens me. I will never quit, because God is on my side.

Secret #5- A confident woman avoids comparisons.
Confidence is not possible as long as we compare ourselves with other people. No matter how good we look, how talented we are, or how successful we are, there is always someone that is better and sooner or later we will run into them. Confidence is found in doing the best we can with what we have to work with and not comparing ourselves with others and competing with them. Our joy shouldn’t be found in being better than others, but in being the best we can be.

Secret #6- A confident woman takes action.
There are two types of people in the world. The ones who WAIT for something to happen and the ones who MAKE something to happen.
Some people are naturally shy, while others are naturally bold, but with God on our side we can live in the supernatural, not natural.
We all have something to overcome. A naturally bold person has to overcome pride, excessive aggression and false confidence, while the naturally shy must overcome anxiety, timidity, the temptation to withdraw from challenges and low confidence.
God works through our faith, not our fear.

Secret #7- A confident woman does not live in “if only” and “what if”.
The world is filled with people who feel empty and unfulfilled because they have spent their lives bemoaning what they did not have, instead of using what they do have. Don’t live in the tyranny of “if only”. If only I had more education, more money, more opportunity or someone to help me. If only I had a better start in life, if only I had not been abused; if only I were taller. If only I were so tall…

I have shared just a tiny little fragment of the book. You shouldn’t miss out on all that is in it.
My favorite secret of all the secrets is “a confident woman is positive”. And that is because I have been able to relate with negative people who find faults while they actually have something they are hiding that’s worse off.
Anyway, you should share your favorite secrets with me via the comment arena and we will address together.

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The HAIR SAGA: whats your take?

Natural hair! Natural hair!! Natural hair!!!
Some months ago my research became so fun and intense concerning this natural hair. About a year ago, I decided to go natural for some reasons. I felt more comfortable when I had no weave on my hair plus I wanted to explore with my hair. But unfortunately, I permed my hair again and that was it. So this year, I came across lovely naturalistas in NIGERIA on twitter(thank God for social media) and I started asking a lot of questions and doing my research.
But to my surprise I found out so many women find it however disgusting or should I say weird to have their natural hair on.
I’m not trying to promote natural hair (rather I’m just a natural hair freak…lol) cause I believe we all have our choices to make about how we want to look.
But what do you think about natural hair? Would you like to grow your natural hair? what’s your take?

POTENTIAL VS. CREDENTIALS: Is your potential more essential than your credentials?

Credential without potential is destiny dimensia
Potential without credential can still pave way for an exponential success
Credential + Potential = Hot cake

It’s a beautiful day and I’m thanking God for that. What about you?. I love to share my thoughts whenever I get inspired by someone or a quote.
Early this morning as I was reading through my tweet line, I found this quote by a friend- “My potential is more essential than my credentials”.
That’s so deep to me! Especially when you understand that “greatness is not found in the degrees you have or the grade you left school with. It is embedded in what you carry within you”.
A couple of weeks back, I was discussing with one of my Mentors, apparently his close friend was there as well. And somehow they started off with this topic of “most first class students being so arrogant and all”. So I listened so I could learn then I contributed as well.

While discussing, they mentioned some of their friends that finished with 3rd class or even a pass and they are doing better than they are now. He made mention of a guy that happened to have the poorest grade when they were in school and he asserted that he is the wealthiest among them now.
From their discussion, they mentioned that;
1) People that leave school with good grades (especially first class students), lack “team-spirit”: they do not know how to work with others. That they depend only on their own strengths and find it difficult to operate in an organization.

2) They are arrogant: meaning most of the people that left school with good grades are very proud. They feel they know it all and do not want to learn from other people

3) They are roaming round the streets”: meaning most of them do not have jobs to do, roaming round the streets without anything to do.
Then His friend cited an example of a guy he helped get a job, who happens to be a first class student. He mentioned that the guy really disturbed him to help him get a job, then eventually he helped him get the job but after a few months they guy quit the job saying “his boss is this and that”. My mentor’s friend said the guy so abused the boss that he had to call his attention to the fact that the person is talking ill of is his friend.
I learned from that. That’s credentials!

In life, if you do not have more to you than certificate then you do not understand what life really means.
That certificate is only a paper until you add value to it-“your potential”.
Within this same society, there are people who;
┬╗Are entrepreneurs in their workplace: they have an average grade and they have very good jobs where they inspire others and have very good working relationships with colleagues as well. They love what they do at work hence, they do the work like its theirs.

So also we there are people who;
┬╗Complain each and everyday about how poor the economy is: all they do is sit and complain about what is wrong about the country and how it affects them so badly without even taking a step to at least try. These people are in the category of the: first class, 2-1.

Do you know that you are responsible for your own life?
Do you know that if you keep complaining about what government didn’t do, it doesn’t mean they will improve for you?
Have you ever made effort to contribute to your soft assets?-your brains!
Have you invested in yourself? Not depending on people all the time.
Have you searched the internet for solutions?
Have you even tried to get your butt off that sit to do something tangible?
Have you been making good use of social media?
Have you taken time out to look at websites to help get a good job?-e.g jobrapido and jobberman.com?
Have you subscribed to get information from them(jobberman and co)?
What are you doing while waiting to get a job?
Are you ready to be responsible for your won life?
Ask yourself these questions and only you knows where you need to adjust.

Remember: “No one will come and meet you to help you, God definitely sends people to help but you must at least leave your comfort zone to meet with them as well”
Have a great weekend and always remember to do something tangible with your life.

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I came across this piece in my old diary. Apparently, I wrote it about 2 years ago, although I really can’t remember the source because I read a whole lot of things and put them down in my diary as they will be useful in future as it is now. So I decided to share it with you. It could help a confused heart, and help you take a step further into doing what you were created to do.
Check it out:

Rule 1: Decide what you want: one of the very worst uses of time is to do something very well that need not to be done at all.

Rule 2: write it down: think on paper, create something you can touch and see. A goal or objective that is not in writing is merely a wish or a fantasy. It has no energy behind it.

Rule 3: Set a deadline on your goal: a goal. Without a deadline has no urgency.

Rule 4: Make a list of everything you can think of that you are going to have to do to achieve your goal.

Rule 5: Organize your (the) list into a plan: Take a few minutes to decide what you need to do first and what you can do later. Lay out your plan visually, in the form of series of boxes/circles on a sheet of paper.

Rule 6: Take action on your plan immediately. Do something, do anything.

Rule 7: Resolve to do something every single day that moves you toward your major goal. Never miss a day-Read a specific number of pages on a key subject, engage in a specific period of physical exercise. Learn a certain number of words in a foreign language.

The key to success is action. Do not confuse activity with accomplishments. Practice is the key to mastering any skill. The person you see is the person you will be. Think on paper.

I wish you great success, we shall see and meet at the top!

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“Will you be my lady series”

Class two:…But do u qualify as a “wifey”?

Men actually see through the personality of a woman when they are “ready”. It is then that they “fish” out the “real” wifey material. If you think he would choose you because of your beauty, darling you are deceived. If at that time, he his carried away by your beauty, a truly ready man will discard you as soon as possible so he can move on to the next “wifey material”.
Whether he is a good or bad man, responsible or irresponsible, a man knows what he wants. And its a woman who will give him PEACE.
Stop hooking up with him, giving him all the sex. If you do not qualify for his wifey material. Girl, he will discard you. And that’s where the heartache begins.
Why not save yourself the heartache and start working on being the “wifey material”…
If you truly show traits of a wife without deceiving yourself,you will attract the “right” man who will definitely hold on to you.
A man wants a valuable woman deep down even if he appreciates your beauty. Start being valuable and not just available!
Think on this!
Feedbacks are highly welcomed.